My parents’ 30th wedding anniversary was on Monday. With all the traveling and Father’s Day and all that, I only managed an e-card. It was cheesy, but it’s the thought that counts, right? I wrote that I hope my marriage is doing as well in 30 years as theirs is.

My mom sent me back an email (signed “Mom and Dad,” but I suspect she wrote it) that made me cry:

Hey Jenn,

Thank you for the e-card. That was very nice of you! I hope that your 30th anniversary is preceded by 30 great years! There are always ups and downs but as long as you can stick together, things have a way of working out. Marriage requires a lot of work from both partners (sometimes more one than the other) but it’s worth the effort. Don’t give up when things get hard, don’t go to bed angry, and always remember the reason you got married to begin with. Remember what you saw in your partner that attracted you to them in the first place. Don’t sweat the small stuff – save your anger for something really important ( not sure what there is to get that angry about). It’s ok to vent but don’t say anything you’ll regret. Words can come back to haunt you.

I know this sounds like a lot of cliches but they’re all true.

All that being said, if you work at it, you’ll reap the rewards. Nobody is perfect all the time (although some are more perfect than others). Remember the things that bug you now will still bug you 30 years from now. They’re not going to go away no matter what you try. Deep down inside people are what they are and don’t expect to see big changes. Love your partner and stay close together always. Listen to what your partner has to say. You don’t actually have to believe it but they have a right to their opinion. Sometimes you’ll find some pearls of wisdom that you don’t expect. Take each day as a gift and spend them wisely.

Love Mom and Dad